An individual's perspective is seldom the view of one person, event or experience. Every perspective is a mix of several such factors and experiences. Overall, it is always possible to see in every perspective, a worldview.
Such is the view that each of us brings to our expression. This is the element in each of us that we would refer to as the mother. It is there in the formative years of our growth as children. But in the growing experience, we mean to outgrow her and bring into our experience our very own identity. In the process, the experience of the mother is smothered over with the child's need to discover itself. But peel away the layers of defenses we have created and there 'she' is, sweet as always and ever so curious about what we are doing with our lives.
In a woman, her identity may defy description, but in the experience of the male, it does lend itself to some understanding of what it is. That of course is curious, that the epitome of the mother is best understood by the mind of a man.
She starts every perspective with the view that eventually we would create a common agreement on the issue. So she begins a perspective with a certain angle; something whimsical, curious, seductive even and persuades the mind to pursue it. The mind is compelled into thinking that whatever it is pursuing is eventually a matter of interests to itself. Such is the experience of the growing child.
As the child engages in the experience, it draws the interests of other elements in its repertoire of experiences. There are the twin teenagers; not greatly concerned about their gender roles, but simply in terms of what they mean to one another. Their relationship divides the world into two halves, shared equally by the two of them, but always with an eye to being always equal in relation to each other.
It is a relationship that the child revels in. He likes the play, the vast orchestration of the passions but, as promised by the mother, it all leads to a common acceptance of ourselves and nobody need feel any alienation in the experience. The child approves of the impulse whole heartedly.
Then the passions start to grow stronger, especially when moved along by spontaneous activity; where there's no time to plan what you want to do. Suddenly it comes to a sense of great discernment between the genders, especially in the teen experience. Yet it is not viewed as being a contradiction. It gets driven on by the apparent contradiction, always thinking that it is such a curiousity in relation to the fact that it IS ALL ONE.
And then without warning, it happens. Feeling curiously alone, the male and female teen feel a sensation of themselves never experienced before. It is something seen only by their eyes alone and not by any other. When they return to each other, there's an awkward gap in what they used to be. The feeling is curious and hilarious at the same time. They see that same experience in each other and feel curious about that other. Then the great game begins.
The child starts to feel active and works to widen the gap between the genders. It creates a place for itself in the middle that it shares with the mother. All four play at being 'somebody' and the game has begun.
In a way, the relation between the two teens becomes the defining experience of the father. It is experienced by the mother as something that moves constantly but is always the same. The father at this point joins with the mother and with the child in tow, we have the makings of a beginning in the experiences of mankind; the sensation of a family in each of us.
In Indian legends, they describe how Siva created his son, Murugan, from his thought. In the relation between Siva and son, he gravitates in his identity to that of the mother, who with her son used to view the Siva experience as the two playful teens, unmindful of gender.
A man today, seeking to understand himself, will come into contact with mother's son, the little child who grew up on mother's strange sense of 'all things will stay the same'. The child wonders then how the excitation, lust, love, passion and strivings grew from his own wonderstruck notion of things. While he is still wondering about them, he meets the seeker coming up the road. The outcome can be both hilarious and sometimes quite deadly.
The advice from the mother is therefore very timely. As you seek to know yourself, bear in mind, the fact that, you never knew anything for certain. That would be called a great start.
Further Reading :
Teen Relations as Father : Archilles and Cousin with Priam
Mother & Son : Venus and Adonais
Teen Relations : Two Peacocks; Art by Whistler
Self Reflection - Zen
Legends of Murugan
Mother & Son : Venus and Adonais
Teen Relations : Two Peacocks; Art by Whistler
Self Reflection - Zen
Legends of Murugan
